In the world of relationships, being a sidechick has become almost a modern cliché. Social media throws glamorous depictions of “the other woman” in our faces daily, expensive gifts, romantic getaways, and lives seemingly full of excitement. But behind the pictures, there’s always more to the story.
Many people wonder: Why would someone willingly enter a relationship with someone who already has a partner? The answer isn’t always simple, and it isn’t always moral. Sometimes, it’s emotional. Sometimes, it’s financial. And sometimes, it’s about human curiosity or circumstance.
The Emotional Pull
For some, it begins with attention and validation. Feeling ignored, unloved, or lonely can make the attention of someone already “taken” incredibly tempting. There’s something intoxicating about being chosen secretly — the excitement, the whispered words, the feeling of being special. Emotional longing, unhealed wounds, or even boredom can push people into these complicated relationships.
The Financial Lure
Let’s not ignore the reality: money and lifestyle are strong motivators. Side relationships can offer gifts, financial support, or access to things a person might not otherwise afford. While some enter for pure affection, others enter with an eye on opportunity. Survival, luxury, and comfort are all part of the equation, and it’s easier to justify choices when basic needs or desires are involved.
Society, Media, and Peer Pressure
Social influence is real. Friends, peers, and even celebrities glamorize side relationships. Stories of “winning” someone else’s affection or enjoying a secret life can make being a sidechick feel adventurous rather than morally complicated. It’s human to be influenced by what seems desirable, trendy, or normalized.
Curiosity and Thrill
Humans are drawn to risk. Some enter these relationships simply to see if they can, to test their own limits, or to experience what they cannot openly have. The thrill of secrecy, of navigating boundaries, and of holding a place in someone’s life despite rules or norms can be addictive.
Filling Gaps or Escaping Reality
Many times, being a sidechick is less about the other person and more about oneself. Loneliness, boredom, dissatisfaction in current relationships, or a desire for excitement can all push someone into this role. It becomes a way to cope with unmet needs, emotional, sexual, or even social.
The Reality Behind the Glamour
Being a sidechick is not always as glamorous as it seems. There’s secrecy, uncertainty, and the constant risk of heartbreak. Yet, for many, the trade-offs feel worth it, at least temporarily. Understanding why someone chooses this path doesn’t excuse it, but it helps us see the human motivations behind complicated choices.
At the end of the day, these relationships reveal truths about desire, power, and human vulnerability. People aren’t purely good or bad; they are navigating a world of limited options, social pressures, and personal needs.
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100 Reasons Why People Become Sidechicks
1. Emotional Reasons
Seeking attention they feel they don’t get elsewhere
Desire for validation or self-esteem boost
Feeling lonely or emotionally neglected
Thrill of being desired secretly
Love of the excitement or forbidden nature
Emotional dependency on someone older or experienced
Hoping for emotional rescue or support
Lack of emotional boundaries
Feeling undervalued in their current relationships
Wanting to feel “special” or unique
2. Financial / Material Reasons
Attracted to wealth or status
Receiving gifts or money from the partner
Access to luxuries otherwise unavailable
Financial dependence
Desire for lifestyle upgrade
Avoiding personal financial struggles
Pressure from social comparison
Belief that the partner can help achieve goals
Bribed or enticed with material incentives
Seeking security or financial backup
3. Social / Peer Influence
Friends are doing it or normalizing it
Social media glamorizing “being a sidechick”
Peer pressure or validation among friends
Belief that it’s trendy or “cool”
Wanting to belong to a certain social circle
Being told they’re “pretty enough to be a sidechick”
Envy of other sidechicks’ lifestyle
Feeling life is boring without drama
Desire to impress peers with connections
Following cultural or celebrity examples
4. Psychological Factors
Low self-esteem
Need for control or power in a relationship
Past trauma influencing choices
Fear of commitment elsewhere
Thrill-seeking or risk-taking personality
Need to feel wanted or pursued
Habit of seeking unavailable partners
Addiction to drama or tension
Belief they are “different” from others
Emotional masochism
5. Romantic / Sexual Reasons
Physical attraction to the partner
Desire for sexual variety
Belief the partner is more exciting than others
Lack of sexual satisfaction elsewhere
Feeling sexually empowered by attention
Experimenting with romantic boundaries
Desire for passion without responsibility
Being swept off their feet by charm
Enjoying secrecy and thrill
Sexual infatuation overriding other concerns
6. Opportunistic / Strategic Reasons
Hoping partner may leave the main relationship
Using the relationship to climb socially
Belief partner can provide opportunities
Strategic move for career gain
Leverage for networking or social connections
Using the relationship as a backup plan
Calculated risk for personal advantage
Waiting for the “right moment” to become main partner
Belief the partner may “settle” in future
Perception of high rewards vs low risk
7. Self-Perception / Identity
Feeling empowered by breaking social rules
Seeing oneself as independent and bold
Enjoying rebellion against norms
Belief they can handle secrecy better than others
Desire to feel glamorous or desired
Viewing themselves as irresistible or special
Pride in being chosen over others
Desire to feel influential in someone’s life
Confidence in emotional or sexual skill
Thrill in maintaining control of a secret
8. Relationship Dissatisfaction
Unhappy in current relationship
Seeking what’s missing (attention, romance, affection)
Partner neglect or abuse in current relationship
Divorce or breakup recovery
Wanting to feel “alive” after heartbreak
Escaping monotony or routine
Hoping side relationship will replace main one
Lack of trust in primary partner
Desire for freedom while still connected to someone
Trying to fill an emotional void
9. Curiosity / Experimentation
Exploring boundaries of love and sex
Desire to see if they can “get away with it”
Testing personal limits
Fascination with secrecy and risk
Observing dynamics of complex relationships
Learning about manipulation and attraction
Experiencing excitement unavailable elsewhere
Using side relationship as a “safe” trial
Testing loyalty and commitment of others
Seeking stories to tell or lessons to learn
10. Cultural / Societal Pressures
Media normalization of side relationships
Celebrity influence glamorizing affairs
Pressure to find a “better” partner
Belief that men with multiple partners are more desirable
Peer comparison creating envy
Societal emphasis on wealth and status
Community norms tolerating infidelity
Gossip culture making secrecy a game
Pressure to appear independent or daring
Belief that modern relationships allow multiple options
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